First Steps marks the fourth attempt to translate the original comic book characters of Reed Richards/Mister Fantastic, Sue Storm/Invisible Woman, Johnny Storm/Human Torch, and Ben Grimm/The Thing to the silver screen. This time, the action will take place in an alternate history/parallel universe set in the ’60s.

Pedro Pascal leads a cast of fine actors in yet another sluggish attempt to bring the Marvel comic heroes to life.

Fee-fi-ho-hum Galactus is going to gobble up the world. But he offers the Four another option: He’ll slow his roll if Reed and Sue hand over their new baby. The doting parents aren’t on board with that plan. So, in a scene that lasts — I kid you not — two minutes, they try and fail to teleport the Earth to another part of the universe.