It's refreshingly perfect.

While canned split pea soup is satisfying in its own right, you can also transform it into an excellent pasta sauce. It's ...

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Split pea soup + ham: Dice regular ham or prosciutto and crisp it in a pot with a drizzle of oil. Pour split pea soup over, then heat. The result? A more deeply flavored savory bowl.

Split-pea soup. I sell it after my shows.” That’s like 15 to 20 laugh lines on the premise of having a powerful vibrator and, not for nothing, the joke keeps on going from there.