I was going to leave Blake Farenthold's new $160,000-a-year lobbying gig alone. Really I was. I didn't want to strain my back picking such low-hanging fruit. Look, I even managed to say his name ...

Child actors, aged 11 and older, are also wanted for the roles of Thing 1 and Thing 2, the Cat’s madcap assistants. Strong movement skills are required, and acrobatic skills are a plus.